I wonder why people are still drawn to other people who have hurt them in the past. I wish as human beings, we had the ability to just shut off someone who has hurt us. Like when we're cut, we bleed. When we're sad, we cry. When somethings funny, we laugh. When we get hurt, we should just beable to do the hockey pockey, and turn yourself about, and thats what its all about.
Jasons a douch bag. And I don't want to be with him. But last night I went out and had a blast with Kristin and some people. And when I got home, and layed in bed, I got sad. Lonley. Horny, yes. I just wanted to be with someone. BUT tell me why, IF I had been with someone, I would have felt guilty afterwards? Why is THAT possible? THAT is not fair. I know I'm the only who comes up with these feelings. It's my responsibility to be a big girl, and tell myself 'People break-up with people, and then they go and sleep with other people. It's Ok. It's normal. It's the nature of life.' (That felt pretty good ;)
So I asked my girlfriends to send me reasons why calling Jason when Im drunk is a retarded idea. I compilled them onto a piece of paper, and tapped it to my wall next to my bed. This is my vow, my promise, my commitment: I will never..do that again.
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